Words can't describe how I feel today. Another empty due date. Another trigger memory for me to endure alone. Oh how I wish this date were different. Of my 3 miscarried babies I probably feel the most connected to Jason because I got to see him and see his tiny heart beating on an ultrasound screen. He was the baby I thought for sure would be my take home alive rainbow baby. His pregnancy was a complete surprise and miracle for me--I just wish it had not ended after 12 short weeks.
My precious Jason I wish you were here today celebrating your real 2nd Birthday. You would be at such a fun age playing with trucks and cars. I'm sure I would have made you a construction cake complete with oreo dirt like I did for your brother. My heart just hurts seeing this date on the calendar now. I hold your little figurine and your empty shoes and just weep for what should have been.
I Love You!
I Miss You!
4 Ever in my Heart!
Love Mommy
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