Picking Up the Pieces

Well, another angel birthday has passed, kinda glad to have it over.  It was a good/sad day, mixed with up and down feelings all day.  I couldn't sleep in the morning so I got up early and took pictures of  Janessa's pinwheel in the sunrise.  That was an incredible experience watching the sunrise--it brought tears to my eyes as I felt a great calm and peace for that moment.

Hopefully the angel party games turned out okay--my kids had fun writing messages on the balloons for Janessa and they looked amazing as they floated into the sky.

My flower garden looked like instant spring flowers had popped up overnight.  All 90 pinwheels looked beautiful and they twirled and spun throughout the day.

Going to the cemetery was hard.  No one should have to celebrate their child's birthday at the cemetery.

We ended the day lighting paper laterns inside and luminaries outside as we remember Janessa at 9:08 p.m.

The people chosen for the pinwheel/angel bear give-a-way were Becky (Liam's Mommy) and Rebecca (Kaison's Mommy) 
I'm finding that the days after Janessa's b-day are hard this year too, because I don't even get my "Whew, I made it through--now I don't have to endure another angel b-day for another year" like I did last year.  My miscarriage has robbed me of that too, because now I switch focus and begin preparing for Hope Abigails--1st angel birthday in 8 weeks.  This is really hard!  Inside I am screaming I can't do this again--but outside I begin to make my lists and preparations.

Thank you to everyone who remembered Janessa on her angel birthday!! <3

Hugs,

:`) Shauna :`(

:)Janessa & Hope's Mommy:)